3월 8부 Chapter 10
When Levin thought what he was and what he was living for, he could find no answer to the questions and was reduced to despair, but he left off questioning himself about it. It seemed as though he knew both what he was and for what he was living, for he acted and lived resolutely and without hesitation. Indeed, in these latter days he was far more decided and unhesitating in life than he had ever been. 레빈은 자신이 무엇이며, 무엇을 위해 살고 있는가에 대해 생각할 때면 답을 찾지 못해 절망에 빠지곤 했다. 하지만 더 이상 그 문제에 대해 자문하기를 멈춘 순간만큼은 자신이 무엇인지, 무엇을 위해 사는지 알것만 같았다. 왜냐하며 그는 확고하고 분명하게 행동하며 살아갔기 때문이다. 요즘같이 사회가 어수선한 때에도 그는 예전보다 훨씬 더 확고하고 분명하게 생활했다.
When he went back to the country at the beginning of June, he went back also to his usual pursuits. The management of the estate, his relations with the peasant sand the neighbors, the care of his household, the management of his sister’s and brother’s property, of which he had the direction, his relations with his wife and kindred, the care of his child, and the new bee-keeping hobby he had taken up that spring, filled all his time. These things occupied him now, not because he justified them to himself by any sort of general principles, as he had done in former days; on the contrary, disappointed by the failure of his former efforts for the general welfare, and too much occupied with his ownthought and the mass of business with which he was burdened from all sides, he had completely given upthinking of the general good, and he busied himself with all this work simply because it seemed to him that he must do what he was doing-that he could not do otherwise. In former days-almost from childhood, and increasingly up to full manhood-when he had tried to do anything that would be good for all, for humanity, for Russia, for the whole village, he had noticed that the idea of it had been pleasant, but the work itself had always been incoherent, that then he had never had a full conviction of its absolute necessity, and that the work that had begun byseeming so great, had grown less and less, till it vanished into nothing. But now, since his marriage, when he had begun to confine himself more and more to living for himself, though he experienced no delight at all at the thought of the work he was doing, he felt a complete conviction of its necessity, saw that it succeeded far better than in old days, and that it kept on growing more and more. 유월 초에 시골로 돌아 온 뒤, 그는 일상적인 업무로 돌아왔다. 농경, 농부들과 이웃과의 교류, 가정의 운영, 그의 손에 맡겨진 누님과 형의 일, 아내와 친척들과의 관계, 아기에 대한 걱정, 양봉이라는 새로운 관심사등 이런 일들에 마음을 빼앗긴 것을 예전에 그랬던 것처럼 그것들을 어떤 일반적인 시각으로 스스로에게 정당화시켜서가 아니었다. 오히려 지금은 공공의 복지를 위한 예전 계획들의 실패에 환명을 느끼기도 했고, 자신의 상념과 사방에서 쏟아지는 일거리 때문에 그가 그런 일에 몰두했던 것은 단지 자신이 해 왔던 것들을 게속해야 할 것 같았기 때문이다. 예전에-그것은 어렸을 때부터 시작되어 완전한 성숙기에 접어들 때까지 계속 성장했다. - 그가 모든 사람을 위해, 인류를 위해, 러시아를 위해, 현을 위해, 농촌 전체를 위해 도움이 되는 뭔가를 하려 했을 때, 그는 그것을 생각하는 일이 기쁜 일이라는 것을 알았다. 그러나 그것들을 실행하는 것은 언제나 어색했고 그 일에 대한 확신도 충분하지 않았다. 그래서 처음엔 너무나 크게 보이던 활동 자체도 점점 작아지고 작아져 아무것도 아닌 것이 되어 버리곤 했다. 그런데 결혼 후 자신을 위힌 생활에 갇히게 된 지금, 그는 비록 자신이 활동할 때 느꼈던 그 이상의 어떤 기쁨도 맛보지 못하게 되었지만 자신의 일이 꼭 필요한 것이라는 확신이 있었고 그것이 점점 더 유익해지고 확장되어 가는 것을 목격했다.