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Many other answers here seem to answer a different, and much less interesting question: why don’t people put themselves into most of their own photos?
But that’s just not the same as why people don’t like having their photo taken… So let’s answer that one thoroughly.
The question inevitably has no single definitive answer, since “people” tend to vary in their reasons for doing the same thing. Why do people kiss? Love? Procreation? Affection? Custom? Of course, it’s all of the above and more.
The same is true here. People might have many reasons for not enjoying having their photo taken. Perhaps they hold some superstitious belief. Or perhaps they feel like they need to fake a smile, and that doesn’t feel good to them. Maybe they just don’t like or trust the photographer.
But, as someone who likes to shoot people, I can tell you there is one reason that rises above all the others, at least in North America:
People know in advance that they won’t be pleased with themselves as they appear in the photo.
And they are probably right.
We all carry a self image, and that self image may be pretty different from reality. We see ourselves, in our minds eye, as younger/older/handsomer/thinner/stronger than we actually are. Lord knows I do.
Unfortunately, the camera doesn’t know about this and just shows us what the light and the angle reveal. For many people, the revelation isn’t something we want to face.
After all, why expose yourself cognitive dissonance if you can avoid it? (Actually, it’s probably a healthy exercise to do so, but that’s neither here nor there.)
So, after shooting tens of thousands of photos in about 25 countries, I can say that in my experience this is the primary reason people do not like having their picture taken.
It is, perhaps, human nature. But it’s also rather sad. The camera sees our real beauty, and most of the time the photographer sees that too. Yet, we ourselves refuse the real loveliness we have for an imaginary beauty we must continually conjure. Over time the delta can only grow.
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Answered Jan 6
From my experience, many people don’t like having their picture taken because they don’t think they look good in photos. And like a lot of things in life, this tends to become a self fulfilling prophecy.
I’m an avid photographer and have photographed many events & people over the years. Typically there is someone at the event who tells me that they don’t like having their picture taken, because, “they never look good in photos.” Often this person is attractive — so it’s usually not a matter of their looks.
Usually I’ll get 1 or 2 photos of this person — if they agree to be photographed at all. Because they believe they don’t look good, and don’t like having their picture taken — they rush through the photos and don’t look natural or happy.
Then, I often run into the other extreme. The person who enjoys getting their photo taken, and happily poses for multiple shots - trying different angles, poses, etc. Often this person is objectively no better or worse looking than the person who told me how horrible they look in pictures. Yet, this person is happier behind the camera, and it shows.
When it comes time to post or distribute the photos, who do you think looks better? Like most everything else in life, taking a good photo takes practice, and if someone doesn’t like having their picture taken, they aren’t going to get much practice. Yet, those that like having their picture taken, generally get some good ones (along with the bad ones).
I’ve also heard that some cultures believe that photography can steal your soul, although I rarely get that response in the US when someone tells me they don’t like having their picture taken.
Originally Answered: Why do I hate to have my picture taken?
Very often I have clients say "Just before we get started... I hate having my pictures taken!". It's a typical occurrence and one that I enjoy overcoming and ending the session with " Wow, this was different experience, I loved the session."
The following are some of the most common reasons why people hate headshots and who to blame for feeling this way...
1 - Blame the photographer; If you had a bad headshot experience it might have been by someone who isn't a professional in the field. It might have been a photographer who is dedicated to capturing weddings, buildings or products and photographs portraits for additional income. It could have been an amateur... Having a great headshot session is like going to a five star hair studio vs getting a haircut by an amateur who is improvising while cutting your hair. A passionate capturer of people's energy will be excited about who you are and will make you feel great and will usually be confident enough to allow you to reshoot.
Recently I posted a job our new headshot photographer - out of hundreds we found but one person. She was kind, intelligent and talented.
2 - Blame yourself; It's you and you have high standards for yourself. Your portrait has to match your standards and if you are like me it rarely happens. More often than not, the picture I see isn't up to my standards and I becomes a disappointment. Hire a talented headshot photographer, he or she may surprise you.

Carol's Headshot
3 - Blame GQ, Vogue and all the major productions; hiring 17 yrs old models pretending to be male business executives and 14 yrs old pretending to be female business executives distorts our reality and expectations. Making us believe that beauty is in the flawless skin instead of what I consider to be an outstanding headshot - a portrait of a seasoned professional with life experience and an untouchable integrity.
Younger does not equate to beauty.
4 - Blame your brain; according to recent forensic studies (Discovery News Article ), our brain protects us by making us feel more beautiful than we think. My brain blames other photographers, if only they were headshot photographers like me - I would have better results.
5 - Blame your anger; might get in trouble here. Would it surprise you to read that angry people will often be angry at their portraits because they came across angry?
This is Rina.
Rina and I went to a eurotrip around Czech, Berlin and Amsterdam.
We met about twice before we got on the plane, and knew each other for a few months only. She never was abroad. She wanted to see only landscapes, while I wanted to see the cities and experience cultures. A shaky start, you'd say.
Well, to my surprise, this was the best month of our lives. We fit together like gloves, it was an amazing experience. I learned to not only like her, but love, appreciate and trust her. Every night we looked forward to the next morning of going anywhere with each other. She's such a positive, happy and ridiculously funny person; everything around her seems brighter and magical.
Rina, in a lot of aspects, is like me. So when I looked at her, I kind of experienced a little bit of myself from an objective angle. When I observed her stunning beauty, she didn't totally agree with me. I thought— that's so absurd, how come she doesn't see how beautiful she is?
I guess when you're constantly with yourself, you have much more time to examine your “flaws”, and when a picture of you is taken by someone else, they can't consider them.
That's because, when you look at someone, usually you see the whole picture. That's one from many things I've learnt after paparazzing my friend almost forcefully the whole trip. That's what I realize about myself now, too— to not be too harsh with myself, cause overall, I like how I look. I think about my looks much less now, and I'm even more satisfied with it today. When you take a selfie you know exactly what you want to show or hide. When someone else shoots a photo of you, they capture your beauty as a whole. That's beautiful, I think.
There are some photos of me, I mean my great grandkids need something to pretend to be interested in, but I usually prefer to take photos containing something other than the same face I see every time I brush my teeth.
Here's some photos I took in Iceland:
I fail to see how these would be improved by the presence of my face.
On a side note, anyone who says you can't take good pictures on an iPhone is lying to you.